A Handful of Horror Movies

I slogged through I, Frankenstein. Some misplaced obligation to Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley prompted me to just sit through it playing as background noise while I set up a few blog posts. As expected, the film’s negligible. Over the top special effects, wtf are these vampires doing here, who’s the devil dude? I don’t know. I wasn’t paying attention.

Boring.

All I’ve heard on Twitter lately is talk about The Quiet Ones, and I know right off the bat that this movie isn’t going to do it for me either. Poltergeists and creepy experiments. Whatever. I’m down with the levitation thing, but I’m hyper-desensitized to the rest. (Unfortunate, because I really do like Jared Harris. Sam Claffin on the roster doesn’t hurt either. He’ll survive, though. He’s just got that face. Also, no one kills off Finnick.)

Here’s the trailer as a reminder of my blahs towards this film.

The Quiet Ones

 

A Handful of Horror Movies

Which brings me around to a couple of movies I’m actually simultaneously terrified of seeing but compelled to do so. What elevates these over the blahs of The Quiet Ones? Well, a little bit of shaky camera, a little bit of a good soundtrack, a little bit of love for the Parisian Catacombs, a little lotta love for Joe Hill, the thing in the closet, exploiting childhood fears, and Dan Radcliffe with an American accent.

As Above, So Below

Basic premise: Bunch of cataphile kids go exploring in subterranean Paris. Following a cave-in (and yes, ignoring the fact that there are multiple entrances and exists to the miles of tunnel beneath the streets) they get more than they bargained for. I tuned in because the phrase “As Above, So Below” is often used in magical and occult circles, and draws from a Hermetic maxim that follows:

These words circulate throughout occult and magical circles. They are recorded in Hermetic texts, although they originated in the Vedas. The actual text of that maxim, as translated by Dennis W. Hauck from The Emerald Tablet of Hermes Trismegistus, is: “That which is Below corresponds to that which is Above, and that which is Above corresponds to that which is Below, to accomplish the miracle of the One Thing.” Thus, whatever happens on any level of reality (physical, emotional, or mental) also happens on every other level.

I think someone might have taken it slightly out of context. As I always understood it, “above” referred to the celestial sphere, and “below” was the earthly. The film seems to be playing on “above” being up here in these parts, and below being hell.

Whatever, I’ll watch it. That thing with the imploding car? Yes.

The Babadook

A double-down on the psychological horror and childhood fears of the boogeyman made real? I don’t even need to explain this. This makes my heart go pitter patter pub dub tweet tweet ba-ba-dooooooooook?

Creepy illustrations too. Love it.

Horns (Clip)

We do not yet have a full trailer for Horns, so I’m giving you a clip featuring Ig and the father of his dead girlfriend (the guy with the shotgun. They blame Ig for her death.) It’s based on a book of the same name by Joe Hill Who Can Do No Wrong.

Basic premise: Ig Parish’s girlfriend dies mysteriously, and he wakes up following the incident with horns sprouting from his head. No one else can see the horns, but he sure can, and so can we. Ig sets off to find out what happened. Insert cacophony of wild squalls from happy Kira.

Personally, I don’t really consider Horns horror, more like… dark fiction with interesting twists… but who’s judging? Worth the watch if it holds up to the book.

 

Anything you’re looking forward to screening this year?

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